Every Battle Can Not Be Won

soulsearching

The idea with this segment “Soul Searching Through Writing” is to share words written in the moment as I felt them, then or now. Share writings from my journals without any filter. Words I spent time writing to find whatever I was looking for or still looking for. In no particular order or category.

September 30th 2016:

There comes a moment when my emotions challenge my every movement and rock the ground I walk on. I then lose all hope and find myself questioning my existence. In the whirlwind of life, fear is present and the mind becomes fragile by the tales of life’s despairs.

As my emotions take the best of me, I’m begging for the strength to carry on. To find the will to face obstacles put in front of me. Yet, during my downswings I have faith that there is meaning even when meaningless acts are thrown at my direction. Then challenging my indecisive mind.

I search for perseverance on the journey of self-discovery. I pray that fear will serve as a guideline rather than a diminisher for all hope. But in fearful moments I witness my self-destructed ways poisoning my sources of merriment. Thus feeding every negative seed ever planted and groomed.

But in fairness of living, I understand every battle cannot be won. Still, I seek victory in life’s battlefields and the confidence to accept while being. And despite hardship I hope that I am able to carry on with life as it holds my hand, guide me to truthfulness and usher its wonders. For in all sensibility, I wish to exist in the uniqueness that is me.

To do so, I battle the struggles in the now and emotions of the past in order to conquest the future. My future.

 

– A.B.

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