#20 – Previous parts in the serie can be found here. A weekly blog post where I share pieces of Mia’s story and journey (as I’m currently writing the novel!).
They say the truth will set you free, but they leave out the part where it’ll first hurt and shatter everything. I rather hold on to the lie a little while longer, for ignorance is bliss.
Lying next to Nicholas is soothing with his arms wrapped around me. My scars are open and beyond description but his gentle care calms my woes. In a moment we’re whole in the depth of our affection, both in too deep. We’re in awe in the moment and it feels as if the world outside doesn’t exist.
Lost in a fantacy, we’ve won the war of us against them. Victorious of the price of pleasure as well as serenity while he’s managed to conquer my flaky heart, now fearfully open.
Emotions are boiling but I don’t dare to ask the words I’m thinking, all in fear of the answer. But under an euphoric spell I ask,
“Would you stay with me?” I’m not quite sure of what I’m asking, only knowing I wish for this day to not come to an end.
“Yes,” he whispers as he lands a kiss on my forehead.
“For how long?”
My insecurities come back to life and diminishes the war we seem to have won. I feel a sudden forceful jolt, I assume it’s reality sending its regards and reminder; the world outside awaits.
“As long as you want me to.”
There is silent but I don’t mind as I hold on and inspect his every word; as-long-as-you-want-me-to.
“I wish you could stay forever.”
I sense fear inviting me but sensibly, I’m able to ignore its regards. Still, not before remembering how we got here and the skeletons that awaits my ruination.
“Then, Forever it is.”
His words casts away signs of uncertainties. In recollection, he did once say he loved me but my flaky heart was not on the receiving end. Though, it never is. Sadly, what my heart is uniting against is uncertain even to the cold hearted. But if it’s love, I’m sure to fall flat on my face before I accept the lunacy that is me, in all flakiness.
PS: I apologize if the format is weird or out of place, is just that I’m away this weekend and had to write and publish the whole post from my smartphone.
Happy Friday 💕