Eight Advice/FYIs I Wish I Knew Before Adulthood

I’m an observer rather than anything else when it comes to interacting with others. Not because I’m shy or afraid of people. I’m polite and a happy person but just an introvert as it’s called. I can be social and make new friends (even though I haven’t done that in a while).

Anyway, the point I’m trying to illustrate is that I like to study situations, environment and people around me before anything else. Like an infant or a toddler, I need an overview and the security of knowing who and what I’m dealing with. And this habit is well established and taken care of as I take public transportation to work everyday. What better environment and situation to observe people in different times and not to mention mood/behavior. The best part is that it doesn’t involve small talk or even interaction. Not that it would be so terrible…

On the train ride to work one morning, feeling tired and trying to accept that it’s monday (also counting the days till friday), I find myself observing a group of teenage girls, discussing whatever teenagers talk about these days, I guess. While observing, my mind travels back in time. To my teenage years, approximately 12 years ago. An era when decisions made or not made would have an effect on the outcome in the now back then or the future of today.

I remember, I seem to be in a rush to grow up. When I turned 13, beginning junior high school I would vigorously count down for the years till high school (with the big and cool kids) and when high school came the countdown to legal age began (18). For an impatient adolescent like myself, it felt like time was moving at a snail’s pace. If only I had today’s wisdom and patients. Today, time flies by at a faster pace but I’m not in a rush to reach any particular number.

Knowing what I know now, nothing turned out the way I had planned. This, in the sense that I had a plan for everything (I’m reminded of that amongst friends). Making a list of dreams and goals was a habit. Today those dreams didn’t see a light of day, mainly because life happened but the habit still lingers on.

However, as my mind wandered back in time, I thought of a few things I wish someone had told me (or even better hammered in) whilst making my way (slowly…) to adulthood. Advice or even FYIs would have been great!

Such as…

It’s all about you and not about pleasing society or those around you. Take advice from those you trust and those that have your best interest in mind. Also don’t be afraid to make a you own decisions or to speak your mind. Be your authentic self.

“Our authentic self is like a flower waiting to flourish.”

You are good enough. No matter how hard you try and fail – the importance is that you don’t give up. Failing at anything or everything is NOT the end of the world, so cast away that feeling of uselessness.

“We’re all failures! The winners are those who keep failing over and over again until they get it right.”

Embrace the good side of you. Stop trying to be a better, skinny, smarter version of whatever/whoever you have in mind.

“Love and embrace the things you are, instead of the things you’re not.”

What you learn in school is not necessarily the norm tomorrow or helpful for when you reach adulthood. The math equation you’re pulling your hair trying to solve is not significant and decisive. So check some of them out from your long-term memory and make room for the important stuff, like finding who you are/who you want be as a person.

It gets better although with more responsibilities – no seriously, it does. Now, breathe!

The downswings of life is inevitable – there is more to come. No human is immune! However, there is sunlight after the storm.

“Take the bad and learn from it but take the good and grow with it.”

There is no limitations to what’s possible. You can achieve greatness; the first step is knowing what you want – honoring your true self and along with believing it’s possible. You are capable.

The past is a part of who you are but it does not define who you are as a person. The present is a result of previous experiences – good or bad. Erasing your past would be erasing who you are.

Finally, young adult – slow down, time is a precious element to cherish. Now, live!

2 thoughts on “Eight Advice/FYIs I Wish I Knew Before Adulthood

  1. passajer says:

    Thank you for an (as always) interesting post. I have sometimes thought about the concept of offering advice, almost like a present to someone, and, like a present, it is more difficult to receive than to give. People would be so knowledgeable if they could learn from other people’s lives and accept advice and direction. But it is also important to make mistakes and take wrong turns and then to learn how to cope with and how to change those mistakes and wrong turns so you can then apply those lessons to the rest of your life. So is giving advice good?
    I don’t often give advice (or perhaps when I do I don’t expect it to be listened to) mainly because I still feel like I am learning and don’t have all the answers. No, maybe that is disingenuous – I have noticed people don’t often take my advice 🙂 Some of the answers I do have may turn out to be wrong later on because I am still on that road to somewhere, learning as I go along.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Amina Berg says:

      Thank you for your comment, it’s always a pleasure to read them, passajer. 🙂 You’re right – it’s important to make mistakes and learn for yourself what works and what doesn’t. Life is after all, amongst other things also about learning, experiencing the good and the bad. I don’t give that much advice either but I’m good at receiving. I think, it’s all about how it’s presented and of course who is presenting/giving the advice. But as adults we shouldn’t be reluctant to share our advice, mistakes or even experiences with the youngsters. We can learn a lot from one another.


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