There was a time not long ago when I did not understand the meaning of my existent and struggles. I still in my days of doubt, fear and confusion walk around with a big question mark. At that time not long ago, I was feeling stuck and could not seem to find the will to get (for lack of a better word), unstuck. The anxiety was taking control of my life and I was scared of never amounting to anything.
I thought since I had experienced so much in my life and achieved a lot that I had done what I was supposed to do here on earth. The typical “what’s the meaning of life”- questions. The year I turned 26, I was already a mother of two, married (going on four years), achieved a bachelor degree and landed my first job after four years as a student, bouncing between married life, motherhood and part-time jobs. I made it my job in taking care of others and pleasing everyone else. A year later I realize that it did not all matter if I was not content nor living in gratitude.
“Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today and creates a vision for tomorrow” – Melody Beattie
They say (top thinkers and spiritual leaders) when we are living our purpose we are in alignment with the universe and our true self. We are no longer living in fear or doubt. Instead, we are in a state of peaceful happiness. The future seems bright and we find ourselves living in the moment. I can honestly say that I am not completely there yet, but I am close enough that the future seems a bit brighter each day. At this moment, I attempt to live in awareness and gratitude for what was, is and will be in my life. Along with attempting to be the best I can be.
“Find appreciation and satisfaction in what you have, and acknowledge it’s existence” – Amina Berg
What I have learned so far; Begin to love yourself. Accept your past, be aware of your present and believe that the future holds great things and experiences. Live in the moment, show gratitude for what you have. You have created your present and you are in control of your thoughts and mind. Finally yet importantly, remember that no one can obtain total clarity and happiness at all time. Our downswings is what makes us humans. We were not created to be flawless nor perfect.